OPEN HANDS.

I hate water. Its never been something I have loved or overly enjoyed. Its a big fear of mine that has grown into my adult life. I can’t really swim, barely a breast stroke if absolutely needed. Growing up my Dad would often take my brother and I to the local swimming pool. Aj would always have a blast, jumping around, driving under water, whilst I would stay close to my Dad clinging to his arm. The control I felt when I was the one holding him would put me at ease, yet little freedom to enjoy myself. When he would try to hold me up himself so that I would splash around or using my arms to swim I wouldn’t let him. He would tell me over and over to trust him, he would never let me go underwater because he cared. However in my little 6 year old head I needed the control to hold on myself.

This idea has grown into my adult life and quiet often my walk with God. My need to clench my hands and not let go, my lack of faith to release and trust God to carry me though life. Clinging onto the presence earthy things that in reality stunt the miracles and provision of God.

I have realise how much life is less enjoyable when all I do is grip with fear, hold tight and try to sort out life by myself. Yet I have seen the excitement when life is given over to the control of God and he pulls through in amazing ways. When he provides money in desperate moments, when he has provided a home for me to always live in, even at the last second. When he has healed my body or kept my immune system strong. When he has laid down for a season or brought friendships into my life in the most precious moments. When I have seen his hand guiding me, helping me and providing me with wisdom and understanding. If I don’t release and trust him, I miss out of this pretty amazing, faith inspiring moments.

The stance of open hands can represent a lot of things! Its a stance we often take when we worship, its almost a physical sign of releasing. When we hold something delicate we wouldn’t clench our fist. Call me crazy (I am ok with that) but I have started to do this. When worry sets in, panic or pressure, when I am trying to desperately work something out for myself, money, a house, a job, food, friendships and relationships I physically open my hands. I open them, hold them their for a short while and say aloud that I realise these things to God. If its the stance I take in worship I want the same stance throughout my life. Open and unclenched hands.

I cant say it been the most perfect few months, however I have felt a deeper peace. I have felt a strong connection to God and been far less stressed. Most days I do it, and repeat it a few times if I need to, but I erge you to try the same.